April Fool's

Tomorrow is April fool’s Day. In the past I haven't really put much thought or stock into April fool’s Day. It has always been innocent and fun but this year it seems different. The more I wade into the waters of infertility, the more I understand the pain of being infertile. I am just on the edge of this. I have only struggled with infertility for about a year. This last year has been hard but there are women who have been struggling with this for several years. There are women that are trying to deal with the pain of not conceiving, women dealing with the pain of a miscarriage or still birth. There are couples out there that are struggling with IVF or adoption and spend each day just getting through but tomorrow will be hard for them.

Tomorrow, someone they know will claim to be pregnant. The announcement will come through a text or email or on a social media site but no matter how it arrives, it will cut. Tomorrow someone unknowingly will cause someone pain because they joke about being pregnant. Some think it is the fake pregnancy that is what cuts the deepest but it's not. I think most infertile women would agree that we deal with news of real pregnancies all the time. Yes, they hurt but it will be the lack of understanding of infertility that will hurt the most. Someone out there is poking fun at how easy it was for them to get pregnant. Someone will not think about those who have lost a child recently and not realize the pain they will drag up or cause. For myself, even though I am disappointed each time someone else gets pregnant I am happy for them deep down. I am glad their struggle to have a baby is over. Maybe it was easy for them, maybe not but now they have the chance to carry life. But when you pretend to be pregnant, it mocks those of us who do struggle and makes it hurt more.

If anyone is actually reading this blog, please remember this tomorrow. When you are trying to find a way to pull an April fool’s joke please remember all those who are struggling and be kind. Find another way to be funny and spare those around you. There may be someone you don't know that is struggling with infertility and you will only add salt to their wound.